Struggling with suicidal ideation (won’t attempt) as a result of the forced treatment (torture, as pharmakeia is sin)

Struggling today with suicidal ideation (just ideation. I won’t attempt suicide, the ‘treatment‘ will kill me in the span of a few years as it was killing me the last time).

the pharmakeia clozapine will progressively rob me of my physical and mental health (I am already having difficulty staying awake and concentrating on simple tasks) and worse yet, it is sin and defiles my body which is a temple of the Holy Spirit.

I intend to challenge the finding of incapacity in February. I did this months ago, but my appeal was blocked by the courts. Perhaps if I use a lawyer offered by legal aid, the courts won’t block my appeal again.

Since this is carried out via legal mechanism and enforced by my nation I don’t know what else to do. Other nations have comparable legislation.

Trusting my Abba, Christ Jesus, and the Holy Spirit to get me through, day by day.

Christ is LORD.